LIFE IS SO PRECIOUS AND FLEETING...

Two weeks ago I was invited to an hour of video recording of my post heart-bypass surgery experience which I underwent 11 years ago, for a former classmate and renown plastic surgeon Dr Charles Lee to be featured in his HeartTalk Website http://hearttalk.com.my/ . In the afternoon there was another one hour recording session with five heart bypass patients (myself included) and by coincidence my very own cardiologist from our National Heart Institute (IJN). Charles himself had recently underwent a bypass and found the experience traumatic and life-changing and was still coming to terms with that surgery. His aim was to share the experiences of other bypass patients to help/comfort other similar patients and to prepare would-be patients.

One of the panel member was a very strapping, healthy-looking 62-year English gentleman who was a retired American football coach, Alan, who now made Malaysia his home for the last few years. He seemed to be the most healthy and least troubled among the panel when describing his experience despite having had a couple of bypasses.

A few days after the session Alan sms me to say that he was pleased to have met me and would like to keep in contact. I replied that I felt the same and that I would contact him after my upcoming holiday in Lombok.
Yesterday morning (10-10-13) I sms him to invite him for lunch today but did not get a reply. At 6 pm I called his number but got no answer.
An hour ago (11-10-13) I received a sms from his number which said Alan had died on 28 September (the very next day after we contacted each other by sms). He was found lifeless on his living room couch and autopsy concluded he died of a heart attack!

I really felt a lump in my throat and felt tears in my eyes to be again jolted into the reality how precious and fragile this life can be...

MAY YOU REST IN PEACE ALAN.

Sunsets in Lombok, October 2013

A week in Usbekistan (Tashkent, Samarkand & Bokhara), May 2013

Mid Year Hello!

Hello, hello, hello. All too soon it is mid 2013 and I have not made an entry since January. Well I am blissfully retired now and far from my worry about how to spend my time, the hours and days seemed to have breezed by and I still have not been able to do all the things I set out to do or promised to do once I stopped working. There is no end to the domestic chores and I still have not organized many things in the house which I really ought to.

And I have finally embarked on travels again. In April I finally realized my dream to go to Kyoto in Japan (one of the few countries I have never been to) and had a most wonderful week there. I had always been intimidated by the idea of going to Japan, at the back of my mind I was worried about the communication problem having heard so much tales about Japanese not speaking English. Well maybe not many people spoke English there but it was so easy getting around with the perfect transport system and information. In fact it was one of the most hassle-free holiday I ever had, plus the perfect weather and the kindest and most polite people ever. I was also lucky to be introduced to a Japanese friend of a friend who took the trouble to show me around for two full days. I missed the cherry blossoms but it was a blessing in a way as all cherry-blossom tourists had left by the time I arrived Kyoto so everywhere I went - the temples, shrines, palaces and gardens, there were few people only and in some I had the whole place to myself.

Now I am even dreaming of going to Kyoto in Autumn some time!

In May I spent a week in Usbekistan, staying at my dear friend and colleaque Hamidah's house and visiting Samarkand and Bokhara as well . That will be in my next entry.

Happy 2013, free again!

1st January 2013, a quiet day at home. My sweet granddaughter Kuca and family left after a late breakfast (and a romp in the pool at our clubhouse before that) to continue shopping for school stuffs before they return to their kampung (village). They stayed the night and we had a lovely dinner at the Lake Club, rather quiet at the coffee house restaurant , despite all the parties to welcome the new year at the Club's other outlets.

Kuca, three years and three months is a real bundle of joy, sweet, smart and inquisitive, good natured and just plain adorable. A few minutes before midnight she came into my bedroom to say goodnight; she kissed my hand and asked for a hug and really hugged me with all her heart. That's when I told her we have to watch the fireworks first before she goes to sleep, at the stroke of midnight from the balcony upstairs.

So here I am at the beginning of a new year, a free man again/at long last. I was briefly free for four months after I retired from my last job when I was offered another appointment. Now just about five months to the end of my third year contract I threw in the towel with a 24-hour notice and a month's salary thrown in . Enough is enough! Work, money, position are nothing when your honour and integrity are questioned. My work and contributions are widely acknowledged by the public, our clients and my staff but not the 'powers-that-be', so what is the point of going on!

Looking back,  2012 had not in fact been a great year for me. @011 was a big bang where I stamped my mark, but things slowed down to a more relaxed pace in 2012. On the personal level, I did not do as much overseas travel as I would like to (unjustified restriction by the powers-that-be) but there was a lot of short internal travels with me discovering my own country.

So where do I begin now, with my new found freedom? I had thought of going far away just to forget everything that had happened but I only got as far as Penang for five days. And it was really the comfort of my own house, my sanctuary, my cocoon that I actually needed. My good friend in Hove, England wrote a very kind, persuasive email asking me to come and spend a few weeks with him to 'drown my sorrow'. But hey, I am over it now, seriously and Alhamdullilah!    

So life goes on, and I am confident something good is cooking up for me. For now I am just enjoying the pleasure of freedom - not having to go to work and not responsible for a whole gamut of things. Last Friday I went to the MAS office and acquired return tickets to Osaka (my actual destination is Kyoto) for mid April - I am finally going to Japan! And in May I will go to Tashkent and visit mygood friend Hamidah. In the meanwhile I can choose to go to Makassar, or Ambon or Surabaya (again) if I want to. Thank God for liberty, at last!
Have a great 2013 everyone. 

A New York Reminiscence

26 September 2000. My 4th week here and things have settled down slightly with the minister's departure last Thursday after an almost 3 weeks stay with a hectic full programme. Apart from the dozens of scheduled UN meetings, there were some 30 other side meetings with his foreign counterparts and other organizations (see how popular Malaysia is!). My team and I worked all day Wednesday till 3 am Thursday to finish the reports of the meetings - all 75 pages of it. Fortunately he was happy with it.

I sat in many meetings but one memorable one was a round table session chaired by Hugo Chavez and attended by many world personalities including Fidel Castro who at some point was chastised by Chavez! I will never forget how a bored Prince Albert of Monaco at some point after having fiddled with his unused microphone, turned around and looking at my direction made some snorting noises with his nose! Most unroyal I thought!!!

Our PM was here too for a few days with his lovely, gracious and motherly wife who always had something nice to say to me. PM surprised everyone by asking me, while waiting for his limousine, about a restaurant we went to in Rome in 1984, right after he made his very strong speech at the General Assembly!

The real work now begins as we break up into a plenary, six committees and several working groups and the working level debates on agendas and issues begin again. Mine is the plenary which starts tomorrow and ends on 23rd December! I foresee lots of interventions, lots of statements and lots of sponsoring of resolutions. Giddy just to think of them. And this time I have only one officer under me instead of four till now. It is rather intimidating to be in the thick of all this but it will look great in my CV later though - DELEGATE TO THE UNITED NATIONS MILLENNIUM SUMMIT AND THE 55TH SESSION OF THE GENERAL ASSEMBLY, September - December 2000!

I visited the orthopedist yesterday and he prescribed me steroids for my legs which had been in sheer agony these 3 weeks for all the walking I did - no car, no chauffeur, just a pair of weary legs and bad shoes. And another 3 months to go, walking daily back and forth from my apartment hotel to our office and then to the UN, and the rest of the Big Apple of course. On Sunday I bought my 6th (yes, SIXTH!) pair of shoes, in my quest to find the best one for my poor feet. And I think I found it, ugly and unfashionable as are.

Over the weekend I moved twice from the 19th floor apartment I'd been occupying all these while to a 24th floor one and then to the 8th floor in the same building! The 19th floor one had 2 queen size bed I did not need , the 24th floor one gave me instant allergy and I was scratching myself from the time I entered it - it was the most requested unit apparently and thus was tatty and overused! I spent only one night there. My present one is fine - so far, BUT, it's a disabled unit - thus more spacious, better furniture and lower. Who cares. Don't discount me moving yet again if things are still not right - at over RM1000 a night we are paying for the unit I have no qualms about changing units till I find the right one especially if I am to occupy it till Christmas.

Haven't had much chance to enjoy NY till now but my colleague Kamal and his wife takes me out of NY every weekend and that a fresh change. Once he took me to a lobster lunch at a friend's house in the country where I felt squeamish and rather shocked to see some 80 live Maine lobsters being put in  boiling water in an old oil tank to cook!  I managed to eat only one lobster and wondered how the other guests could eat so much...! Next weekend I'll visit my cousin Dan and his wife Maz for lunch, and it happens to be thanksgiving day. Dan has lived  here for the last 20 years and has a house one and half hours train ride away. Haven't seen him since he was a boy, we had lunch together yesterday.

In terms of entertainment there are so much to offer and I am determined to attend as many shows as I can. So far twice to the Metropolitan Opera, first for Arrigo Biotto "Mefistofeles" which was a magnificent sumptuous production with lavish stage sets, except the lady who sat next to me I could swear had not had a bath for months and smelled like a pigsty!!! I also saw Camille Saint-Saens' "Samson and Delilah" with Placido Domingo no less in the lead, but in comparison it was a stark minimalist production with hardly any stage props. I also went to see "The Lion King" and there was a buzz in the theatre because Shirley Bassey was in the audience, sitting a few row in front of me!

Am also enjoying too much the food here especially Japanese and Indian, and Malaysian of course. The Malaysian restaurants in Chinatown serves authentic fares - anything you want lah, even pasumbur and roti canai. The city never sleeps , once at 2.30 am I woke up with a heartburn and went to a drugstore-grocery-cafe-snack bar-all-in-one just a block from my building for relief.

New York never stops either. Rafidah Aziz and a 30-member investment was here since Sunday and today left for Chicago. The 6 MPs are here for 3 weeks and three wives joined over the weekend . There is always someone or another in town at any time.

It's been raining all day since last night. I escaped into a cinema lat night and sat through Lars von Thiers' "Dancer in the Dark", Cannes 2000 Best Picture and Best Actress - Icelandic singer Bjork, but it has to be the most excruciating 2 and a half hour cinematic experience for me. If it comes your way, skip it!

At home ground in Lima crucial developments taking place. Am online daily with my office. I miss my cat Toby more than anything! Have booked myself a flight home to KL on 26 December arriving 28 in time for Hari Raya but I am yet to get approval from HQ.
Three more months in the Big Apple! Sigh...

12 December 2012 (12-12-12) and new artwork.

Greetings, it has been five months since my last entry. How time has flown and how so many things have happened. I just wish the next six months will breeze through and by June I will finish my contract and say goodbye to this job. I am wondering now if accepting the renewal of my contract six months ago was a wise things to do. I had done a lot of good things the last two years and in some ways have reached the peak, now things seem to be getting more difficult and troublesome.

My helping out someone in dire need of a job by hiring him had resulted in much instability and discord in the instiution resulting in his dismissal after 7 months. And now that has its own negative repercussions with unfair accusations and perceptions of abuse of power on my part by the powers that be. So if I do not have the authority to manage the place in the manner I see fit, what good is my position? All too much for a retiree like me! Please God let me properly finish my job, especially two big projects and after that I will be happy to let go, pasrah, redha, que sara sara. Whatever!

My young charge tells me all these means God is planning something better for my future. May be. In sha Allah!    

So what is so significant abour 12 December 2012? I am waiting, but not holding my breath!